Published: May 10, 2008 11:54 pm            

Step up to the plate

The college selection process is not just a way to pick out the best college. It’s also an excellent exercise in moving from one stage of life (living at home) to another (living at least partially away from home). It’s a process through which independence, decision making skills, and confidence are developed – at least that’s how it should be. The whole process is about finding the best location/situation to live away from home for the majority of the year. So why not get practice making those decisions, and doing things for yourself now?

Students, you can go a long way toward earning the freedom you so badly want, by showing yourself to be mature and able to take care of yourself. As I see it, this whole process is a series of opportunities to gain the confidence of your family and others. With that confidence, likely will come more freedom. You should take control of this process by starting the conversation about college, asking for input, letting your thoughts be known, starting to plan, etc.

“Hey Mom, when we go to Wal-Mart next time, can I get one of those boxes with hanging files in it, and a big wall calendar? I was thinking of starting a college file…” (see my column on “Organizing Your College Selection Process”) or “Didn’t you say Uncle Bill was an engineer? My counselor at school says I should think about becoming an engineer…”

You know darn well that your parents will be more than happy to jump in and “help” you do things if you don’t do them yourself. How about doing some research, thinking on your own, and even talking to your high school counselor ahead of time and then asking them for help or opinions where you don’t know the answer or need input. That way you get their help when you want and need it, instead of what you probably think is just them telling you what to do all the time. Below are some more of your responsibilities in this process. Take care of them, and you’ll be in control of the process.

Come up with your list of schools, but then seek input and suggestions from your family, friends and counselor.

• On campus visits, take the lead and ask the questions that need asking.

• Keep track of all important deadlines (ask for help remembering).

• Keep your family informed about and involved in your college selection process.

• Don’t cheat – write your own essays. Don’t be lazy – type your own applications. Ask when you need help.

• Choose your major. Choose the college. And choose the classes you take and the times of those classes.

• Next week… Role/Responsibilities of the Parent

Submit your questions or comments to lance@collegeanswerguy.com and visit www.collegeanswerguy.com and www.collegeprep101. com

        

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